Golf: SPOX-Par-10 to the US Open: Philip Alfred, to the rector please!

Brooks Koepka wins his second US Open title in a row at Shinnecock Hills. Respect! But the whole world is talking about Phil Mickelson’s epic dropouts. Tiger Woods and Martin Kaymer are swallowed up like many other stars. The wailing is big and the Par-10 therefore totally enthusiastic.

I want my US Open back! If this had been the PGA Championship, then everything would have been fine and we would be talking about a great tournament. But it should be a US Open. An event you win at seven over par, not 16 under. An event where the fairways are as narrow as the corridor in the SPOX office. An event where players hate themselves and golf all week because it’s no fun. It’s not supposed to, damn it! Not at the US Open! 133 laps under par? If I wanted to see the Greater Milwaukee Open, I would have said so.

Things were different in Erin Hills. A place can be as long as he wants. If there is no wind on such a course (except for the final day) and the players also find soft greens, then they take it apart. Especially as the USGA was obviously a bit scared after the criticism of the past years and acted cautiously during the setup.

In 2018 the US Open returns to Shinnecock Hills. In 2004 Retief Goosen won there. Only the South African and Phil Mickelson, who, as usual, finished second, stayed under par. Hopefully we get our US Open back next year.

Yes, we got them back! Was that awesome, or was that awesome, dear friends of golf? Especially this Saturday. My God, we’ve had the Zach Johnsons moaning about this world again. It’s not fair. All mean. Boo, USGA, Boo. What a mess, it was wonderful.

Tony Finau and Daniel Berger both recorded laps of 66 in the morning under comparatively “easy” conditions and were able to watch them comfortably on the couch in the afternoon as they climbed up on the leaderboard. In the evening they were suddenly in front and in the last group for Sunday. It was fascinating.

Yes, it was borderline too, but that’s what makes a real US Open. Week after week, we see the best players in the world tear apart their seats in the world and win the tournaments at 20 under par. Once a year, balls have to be putted off the green and shots that look good have to roll into the bunker. Once a year you have to cry.

It was almost a pity that the USGA buckled a bit and made the course much more playable for the final round by watering it extremely and supporting it with flag positions like the monthly cup. What was the difference between day 3 and 4? All we have to do is ask Rickie Fowler. He played an 84 on Saturday. 65 on Sunday.

There was, of course, another guy who didn’t join in the chorus of whining. Masters Champion Patrick Reed said: “If you make good strokes, you can do it.” Great guy.

On Sunday, after a brilliant start (-5 after 7), it even seemed for a while that the second step on the way to Patrick-Slam might be possible before Reed ran out of breath a bit on the second nine. Nevertheless again a very strong appearance of the US-Boy. His last three placings with majors: 2, 1, 4.

It was Saturday evening, it must have been shortly after the Peru-Denmark World Cup crash, when the Internet exploded again. But this time it wasn’t about a photo with Erdogan followed by an audience with the Federal President and also not about the final Steel cage match between Angela Merkel and Horst Seehofer, it was about Philip Alfred Mickelson. And anyway, it was a lot worse.

What had happened? Mickelson’s bogey putt at 13 had passed the hole and rolled 50 yards off the green in the best possible way when Lefty suddenly started jogging halfway and pushed the moving ball back up the hill to the other side of the hole. Silence. He didn’t just do that? He didn’t seriously just do that? At a US Open?

His flight partner Andrew “Beef” Johnston was as shocked as everyone else, but he had actually done it. The normal punishment for this offence is two blows, but disqualification may also be imposed if it is considered a particularly serious offence.

Which, of course, was done immediately by many parties. Tar and feathers, many said. Eh clear. Others tried to appease. He hadn’t stripped and shipped into the hole, so give me a break. Kind of right, too.

Mickelson finished the hole and asked the official to tell him what score he was going to get. In the end it was a 10th Mickelson at par-4, at that time there was no chance anyway, scores didn’t matter any more. But what are we going to do about this huge scandal?

When Mickelson was asked about his round by 3,000 journalists, he actually stated that he had done the action intentionally for strategic reasons, so to speak. Because he simply wanted to make the most of the rules and the two penalty shots would have been a better solution than to let the ball roll off the green. Then maybe he’d still be standing there. Besides, he always wanted to do that. Of course, it wasn’t meant disrespectfully, but everyone who is upset should not queue up like that. MADNESS.

Now there are two possibilities: Mickelson’s telling the truth. It’s quite conceivable, the way it ticks. “I’m so fucking smart.” However, he admits to having cheated out of calculation and should have been disqualified by then at the latest. Then why does he do it anyway? To potentially gain a small advantage and save a blow? But who was completely irrelevant, so far behind he was on the leaderboard. To do something for it, which otherwise only a certain John Daly once afforded in Pinehurst and thus damage his reputation? Crazy.

Possibility two: It wasn’t a calculation, but Mickelson just snapped and made up his mind afterwards. Of course, the Par-10 could understand the outburst. Mickelson and the US Open, that won’t work out anymore. He turned 48 on Saturday, the chances of the Career Grand Slam are dwindling and dwindling. When you experience such a frustrating week and putt around your head, it is somewhere human that such an action can occur. But then he could and should have admitted it. As is often the case, dealing with the error afterwards is worse than the error itself.

The fact that Phil broke out on Sunday after his punched par putt at the “Tatort” in rejoicing fit the picture and did not necessarily make things any better. Especially since he didn’t want to speak after the final round. This was done by his wife Amy, who said that it was not Phil’s best moment in his life and that everyone had such moments. That’s actually pretty good. Nevertheless, much more will be talked about.

Tiger could have gone home on Thursday after his first two holes. Triple-Bogey, Bogey. Woods could not recover from his catastrophic start, played the 1 and 2 in seven over par, and was out after 36 holes at +10. Even two birdies were of no use at the end.

For Woods, it was the third missed cut in his 20th US Open appearance, the second in a row after his problems in 2015 at Chambers Bay: “I’m not very happy about how I played and putted. I’m 10 over par. That says it all,” Woods said.

Woods has now played ten events after his wondrous comeback and at times made an outstanding impression. At the Valspar Championship and the Arnold Palmer Invitational he was not far from winning. But lately he has taken a step backwards, mainly because of massive problems on the greens. What’s the next step? Will he actually win again soon? I don’t know. He won’t know it himself.

10-6: Mickelson Gate and Shinnecock Gate

5-1: The back-to-back champ and Europe’s new superstar